Get ready guys, this is going to be a long one….. Urgh the moment I’ve been dreading since being employed by the NHS….. I’ve tested positive!

It’s Wednesday 28th October 2020 and I had my results back last night. The reason I was tested in the first place was because I’d come down with flu like symptoms in the early hours of Sunday morning, I literally felt like I’d been hit by a car my body ached so bad. I had a headache that I couldn’t seem to shift and I had the hot and cold flushes but no temperature, and at times was incredibly shaky. I felt the same Monday morning so decided to get in touch with my staff nurse and let her know I wouldn’t be on shift the following day which is when she suggested I get tested to be on the safe side. I need to point out I had no covid symptoms…… no temp, no loss of taste or smell and no cough.

I absolutely can not fault the microbiology department at Poole hospital- they called me straight away and told me to head down to the test site as soon as I was ready, so by lunchtime Monday I’d been tested and was back home on the sofa with my duvet and in my pjs! I was told by the testing nurse because I was staff I should have my results super quick which made me feel better. I was already panicking about not being able to work this week! Not at any point did it cross my mind I had coronavirus. I’ve read so many horror stories on it in the previous months, I wasn’t on deaths door I just felt poorly and exhausted but I’d spent all day Saturday in the rain outside so it’s just a flu type virus from my own stupidity!

Tuesday I felt slightly better, I still had a headache and I’d become quite nasally but on the whole I wasn’t too bad. Tuesday night I had a phone call from the hospital and I genuinely couldn’t believe I’d got a positive result! I had been sorting childcare with my kids dad for the following day so I could power through and go back to work!!

I also want to point out thank god my staff nurse suggested I get tested! Obviously I was upset and panic really set in Tuesday evening, I even phoned 2 of my closest friends and told them if shit hit the fan I’d be sending them both over instructions on who’s to look after the kids etc if I wasn’t around to make any decisions- (yes I’m dramatic but you can never be too organised).

It’s Wednesday morning and I feel ok, I’m still very head coldy and taking it easy but I’m really hoping I’m one of the majority that only experience the milder symptoms. Being type 1 diabetic I do panic a bit more than I should but I’m generally in good health so I’m just taking each day as it comes. I’ve been so lucky since last night being inundated with messages offering help or doorstep drops etc and just well wishes it really is so lovely.

I’ll carry on writing about how I feel over the next 2 weeks to keep track of my symptoms but honestly another 2 weeks isolating with the kids scares me enough ha!

Wish me luck!

Edit* I’ve actually lost my sense of smell this evening! Taste is fine, drank a tea ate 3 biscuits and a cheese string to check! I’ve also started coughing tonight as well, so I’m antibac’ing everything in sight and washing my hands constantly! I’m desperate for the boys not to get it.

Thursday 29/10- I woke up this morning and immediately went to the fridge to check my sense of taste is still there….. it is THANK GOD! I keep thinking what if I can’t taste my food? it’ll be criminal! my cough has worsened and I’m overly paranoid about my clothes carrying germs so everything that comes off goes straight in a hot wash. Everyone’s bedding was done yesterday even though I’d only done the beds 3 days prior to that, and I’ll be stripping the beds every other day to keep them as clean as possible. I still have a headache but with the cold and flu tablets I actually don’t feel that bad until they start to wear off!

Friday 30/10- The one thing I’m grateful for is I haven’t yet lost my appetite. I find because of my health condition, when I get poorly I usually make myself worse because I never eat through an illness! So I rarely have the strength to power through, but this time I’m making sure I eat at least a couple of meals each day or snack on and off. I’m also drinking loads! (my friend told me to keep drinking as it washes the virus down into your stomach acid). I don’t know how accurate that actually is but either way it’s keeping my fluid levels up! I’m still full of cold- my body really aches again today and I’m already sick of coughing. I still have no sense of smell but not being able to smell Romans dirty nappies is a win in itself and we must take these wherever we can!

I’ve written myself a self isolation to-do list for over the next week or so and I was planning to start it today but as I lay on the sofa under my duvet catching up on last nights telly I’m realising I don’t think I’ll have the energy to do anything other than what I’m doing right now. It’s becoming really difficult to keep roman settled but at a safe distance. He just doesn’t understand and he’s so clingy anyway that all he wants to do is sit on my lap or lay in bed with me. He had quite a bad night last night, no temperature but he was agitated and kept waking up screaming and shouting. In the end he had to come in with me, he tossed and turned the rest of the night so I’m really aware of his health today and am keeping such a close eye on him. This is where I’m starting to really struggle being the only adult in the house! Every morning I’m waking up praying I haven’t worsened over night because if I do who will come and look after the kids?! I just can’t bring myself to ask a well person to put themselves at risk by being around us to help! I’ll check in later and let you know how we’re getting on!

Saturday 31/10-Halloween 2020- I went to bed really early last night as the whole day yesterday was bloody exhausting. So I didn’t get round to doing an update last night but…. roman perked up a lot in the evening and he went through the night without waking, he’s still not showing any signs of symptoms of anything so I’m hoping he’s ok! I spoke to my doctor and a nurse at the hospital about him yesterday and we decided I’d carry on keeping an eye on him and if anything changes I’d call 111 and get him seen ASAP. I guess it’s really hard for staff at the surgery’s/hospitals, they’ve got to make a decision based on weather a child is poorly enough to be seen whilst putting their staff in danger of being around a covid positive parent! The whole situation is nightmarish. Ideally my kids should have gone to stay with their dad or my mum for the 2 weeks while I recovered and then they’d have been safe from contracting it from me, but instead we have to be all together all the time because they could already be carrying it. But I can’t shut myself away in my bedroom for 2 weeks because I’m the only adult in the house! It’s been stressful to say the least.

I’ve woke feeling better, the coughing is really taking it’s toll now along with the headache, and my washing machine is constantly on a hot wash. I can’t believe we’ve already done a week in isolation from tomorrow! I know it’s been really hard on the kids, I’ve not been in a state to do anything remotely fun and the weathers been shocking so they can’t even go outside! But I’m hoping next week I’ll be back to normal and I can start checking off my to-do list and actually splitting the days up a bit! So far all we’ve done is shower and get into more clean pjs every day!

Monday 02/11- This morning not much to update, the headache is taking it’s toll a bit now. It’s a dull ache in my forehead and I’ve had it for 8 days now!! My sense of smell is starting to come back, I lit a match last night and could smell it when I blew it out. I did wonder if it was making its way back as I’d had tingly sinuses all day yesterday and I’d had the same feeling the day I lost it ha! My cough has turned chesty, it’s been a really dry cough for the last week but now even though it’s not as frequent it’s definitely chesty. The boys have absolutely got “four wall syndrome” they’re literally climbing them! We’ve got 6 more days to go!

Thursday 05/11- were almost there!!! We’re so close to the end now I can smell it- actually I can’t as that sense still hasn’t made a full return but you get my drift! The last few days have been ok, my cough has died down loads and my headache is finally lifting and only rears it’s ugly head in the evenings now. Im so so happy the boys didn’t come out with symptoms and catch anything from me, I tried really hard to protect them from me. Since being in isolation lockdown 2.0 has hit the uk but I’m glad the kids are still allowed to go to school, I know there’s such huge opinions on this and I get it from all sides but for me personally, the first lockdown was so hard on us and me as a parent. Keeping the school routine this time round is going to be so much easier on my mental health and for the kids day to day structure. I’ve made the decision to not go back on my ward at the hospital for the time being, I wish there were proper evidence that once you have had the virus you are immune or very very unlikely to catch it again but unfortunately there isn’t any solid proof. In all honesty I’m a bit scared now! I was very lucky I was still able to parent my kids whilst having COVID-19 but if I were to get it again and not be as lucky? It really worries me now. So at the moment I’m in communication with my line manager trying to work out what the best solution is for me temporarily, just until it’s calmed again and I can return to the wards.

My isolation to-do list finally has ticks on it! During the last few days I’ve managed to really go through all our clothes, switch my wardrobe over fully to autumn/winter and get rid of everything the boys are growing out of. The beauty room has become a bit of a dumping ground/ laundry room over the last couple of weeks so that room is next!

Sunday 08/11- WE’RE OUTTTTTT! We can officially leave the house today- is it weird that I’m a bit scared to go back into shops?! It’s been a bloody long 2 weeks but we made it to the end- thank you so much to all of my family and friends for you’re constant texts and calls, delivering food shopping for us, all my flower deliveries and presents dropped for the kids entertainment. I’ve had my grandparents turning up wearing masks so they could drop shopping off at the door or leave costa coffees on the doorstep, I’ve just really felt the love and it got me through some really challenging days! I just want to get across, no matter your views on this virus, it’s real, it’s becoming more common and if anything, just wear a mask. I was lucky I wasn’t hospitalised but that probably had something to do with the fact I’m in good health even with my underlying health condition. Other people haven’t and won’t be so lucky and it’s so so important to follow the rules. I’ve seen it first hand in the hospitals and then experienced it first hand and if we can all do our bit of wearing masks, washing hands and sanitising everything we can then we can help protect people who won’t be as lucky as me if they contract it.

2020 has been such a shit year, one I’m sure so many people want to move on from! I’m really hoping we can all improve in time to celebrate Christmas the way we all normally would! One good thing to come out of my 2 week isolation? I’ve managed to get sooooo much of my online Xmas shopping done!! Got to look for those positives guys!

Stay safe!


Saturday was the first day I put proper clothes and a little bit of makeup on in 2 weeks!

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